Are We Dreaming?

I've been gone for a minute but trust me it wasn't because there was nothing going on. Over the course of the last week I have found myself playing the role of counselor and confidant to both my male and female friends. Everyone is going through relationship woes lately. These are a few (and I do mean few) of the phrases that have filtered through my cell phone as of late...

1. Men are all the same.
2. I just need to stop looking for Prince Charming,
3. I've got to be dreaming to think that he would change.
4. Yo! Why don't she call me?
5. Ok... I cheated... But why
6. He just can’t commit to one person!
7. I Loooove Women! I can’t help it! Women want me!
8. I have an active sex life with my girlfriend. I look around because of the thrill of the chase!
9. I hear this one more often than I care to relive... I am sure that you have heard this as well. It is frightening. "Maybe my boyfriend has been unfaithful and I just don’t know about it, or I didn’t see the signs or didn’t want to see the signs".

But why is it that so many people jump the fence? Is it because of an unsatisfying sex life? Or is it for that quest of lost infatuation? Is it a perversion?

Yes, there are those who are just afraid of commitment. The only way that they reassure themselves that they still have that freedom or virility is by sleeping with someone else. Period. This has nothing to do with the level of quality of the relationship that they are currently involved in. Some need a higher dose of freedom then others.

Anyhow, who wants to be with someone who always is looking to prove to themself that they sre free or is indeed "The (Wo)Man"?

Also, there is the element of opportunities. Statistics (call me a ghetto sociologist) have proven that the more beautiful (whatever that means to you) the person is... the incidence of being unfaithful is increased.

Does it mean that we should only date ugly people to reassure our insecurities? HAYELL NAW!

I don't think so. Be aware that if you find someone beautiful (again, whatever this means to you), there are at least 15 other people out there who find your mate attractive, whether he or she has a die hard body or be fluffy just the way you like it. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Selfishness is also another indicator of your level of devotion. Selfishness does not care about the feeling of others and that feeling exits in the present only. It is an immature behavior that we are supposed to have evolved from at the teenage age.

Think about it a little bit: when someone is unfaithful, in the moment, that person doesn’t think at all of the consequences or how the partner might feel! They are more likely thinkin' about what they are gettin' out of that moment.

I would say that, in the end, it is the commitment and the level of respect for yourself and your partner that determines if there will be less chance of infidelity within your relationship. With openness and caring of the feelings of your partner, you will better be able not to be tempted by that chick at work, or that overly nice and somewhat handsome colleague at work.

BOTTOM LINE >>>>> Look for that person with a noble heart, a high level of maturity, who demonstrates admiration, RESPECT and generosity towards you.